The Timeless Mantra That Changed Everything For Me

For the past 11 years, there has been a positive gravitational force.

Its name? Maybe "intentional, positive, personal change".

I've been diagnosed with a chronic illness I'll survive until I don't.

Worse, I've lost people I care about and left scars on my heart.

Worse, I've helplessly watched someone forget who I was and the moments we'd made together.

But in the face of bad and worse and worse still, things have gotten good and better and better still.

Because 11 years ago today I adopted this mantra: "Every time you see me, you're going to see a better version of me".

It has the same invigorating effect today it did 4015 days ago. It gets me fired up.

It doesn't say "Every day, things will get better around me". It says "Every time you see me, you're going to see a better version of me".

Honoring that commitment has bent the arc of my life towards transformation. Towards curiosity, generosity, influence, confidence, and an earned self-esteem that can't be stolen.

It holds me accountable to real growth, and not just a good story. It has to be recognizable. It has to be consistent. And it has to be authentic: a better version of me, not someone else.

And that's created a healthy commitment to intentional, positive, personal change that has made things good, better, and better still. That's brought purpose for tomorrow when today serves up its worst.

Writing Habit = Clarity Habit

I'm taking on a challenge from Dickie Bush: ship 30 mini-essays in 30 days.
Why on earth would I spend 1 hour per day writing, editing, publishing... especially when that means I'll spend 23 hours agonizing over what to write about?
Because a writing habit is a thinking habit, a clarity habit.

I ended 2020 like many of us, with two 18-wheelers full of pivots, lessons , and opportunities.
All in my head.

Publishing forces us to clarify something to a different level of coherence.

It makes us focus on one thing.
Like a mental oven on a popcorn kernel.

It also gives new purpose when we listen to you, social media, articles, podcasts, books.
When we notice something illuminating...
Worth sitting with...
Worth writing on until the kernel in the mental oven pops...

That process accelerates the internalization of the idea.
So we don't forget. And if we do... at least it is written down somewhere to stumble on later.

PS. Thinking I’ll call these essays "lightbulb moments" or 💡 for short. What do you think?

Why I Gave a Complete Stranger a Bottle of 20-year old Bourbon

A few years ago, I was arriving home at the Nashville airport, in my routine.

All carry-on.

In my exit row seat.

My Hook+Albert garment carry on that's perfect for 3-day biz travel.

I hit the exact spot in the terminal to order my uber so it's pulling to a stop when I walk up.

I do this 40x per year, it's a science.

But then my pattern is broken. NCAA March Madness has basketball fans flooding the city. The uber wait is an extra 6 minutes, basically eternity.

I find myself next to a striking French-accent talking to his wife about how the uber they waited 14 minutes for... just cancelled. 17 more painful minutes on the sidewalk.

They didn't look like axe-murderers.

Something in me said "Hey, mine's here in 90 seconds. Where are you headed?"

I was on their way + 5 minutes.

Isn't it amazing what we'll do to save 10 minutes?

It was like I'd saved their vacation.

We hit it off and found we had mutual appreciation for fine dining and spirits. They were ballet dancers turned parents and a money manager. I told our uber to wait for a tip + 5-stars.

They came inside my house. I insisted they have a sip of my favorite bourbon: Orphan Barrel Barterhouse 20 year. I poured a sip for each of us and a little extra for serendipity. They reacted how I did. Where your eyebrows start moving, and your toes curl.

Then it happened.

I handed them the $150 bottle and insisted they have it. I've been friends with Karen and Sylvain LaPointe ever since. We've had more wine, more bourbon, and a 3-star michelin meal too. And more great conversations.

The 💡 I never want to forget? Radical generosity can accelerate trust and relationships by 15 months in 15 minutes. Never underestimate the power of an unexpected moment for yourself and for others.

If the secret to living is giving, then the secret to living life to the fullest might be giving to the fullest. That's why I want the message of my life to be one of radical generosity.

The Timeless Mantra That Changed Everything For Me

For the past 11 years, there has been a positive gravitational force.

Its name? Maybe "intentional, positive, personal change".

I've been diagnosed with a chronic illness I'll survive until I don't.

Worse, I've lost people I care about and left scars on my heart.

Worse, I've helplessly watched someone forget who I was and the moments we'd made together.

But in the face of bad and worse and worse still, things have gotten good and better and better still.

Because 11 years ago today I adopted this mantra: "Every time you see me, you're going to see a better version of me".

It has the same invigorating effect today it did 4015 days ago. It gets me fired up.

It doesn't say "Every day, things will get better around me". It says "Every time you see me, you're going to see a better version of me".

Honoring that commitment has bent the arc of my life towards transformation. Towards curiosity, generosity, influence, confidence, and an earned self-esteem that can't be stolen.

It holds me accountable to real growth, and not just a good story. It has to be recognizable. It has to be consistent. And it has to be authentic: a better version of me, not someone else.

And that's created a healthy commitment to intentional, positive, personal change that has made things good, better, and better still. That's brought purpose for tomorrow when today serves up its worst.